The Boys (this is how I refer to both 1- a family of five boys who were dear friends in Waco 2- a group of three men who were some of my best friends in Berlin) used to think it was so funny when I would say, “You can take the girl out of Texas, but you can’t take Texas out of the girl.” This was generally said when I was pulling on my cowboy boots, and met with laughter. It was also met with respect when I enjoyed a good amount of delicious beer, or made them a really delicious chicken fried steak with gravy. Needless to say, it didn’t take much to impress them. But, I adore them and so to impress them was a thrill.
I have come to believe that I was lying to them. I didn’t think I was lying to them. I really do even now believe that I love Texas. Songs about Texas make me cry. I want to live in Texas. I want to eat the food in Texas. I want to be with my friends in Texas. I want to vote in person in Texas. I want to drive forever through Texas. I want to listen to music in Texas. I want to listen to people talk in Texas. I want to eat ice cream in Texas – Amy’s or Blue Bell will do. I want to watch sports in Texas, instead of Texas in sports. I want to be in Texas all the time. Well, therein lies the fallibility. Tonight I ran a quick five mile run, and it was warm (76) and humid and I wanted to die. Literally. I cannot remember what it’s like to run in that kind of sticky heat. I did not like it. It was gross. I was grossed out. I kept thinking, “GAAAAHHHHHH, it’s so hot. I don’t want to run. It’s too hot. I am hot. I hate this hotness. I am so hot my hair is sticking to my back. I might die from the hot and the sticky and the – ughhhhhhhhhhh HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HATE HOT HOT HOT HATE HATE HATE HATE HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT.” and so on and so forth. For 5 miles. Actually 5.43 long, humid, hot, miles.
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAKKKK SCRAAAAAATCHHHHH REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWIIIIIINNNNNNNDD
Did the blond from Austin. Texas just say that 76 is warm??? Did the girl who trained for ENTIRE marathons in Texas just act like 76 and humid was inconvenient??? The girl whose family awakens before the dawn just to hope to run in pre-80degree weather? The Texas is OBVIOUSLY out of the girl. She’s lost her God given mind. I should have been running the river THANKING GOD I wasn’t in a fall heat wave in Texas. That’s what I should have been doing. That’s what I wanted to be doing… But instead this girl who has spent the last 5 years in foreign (Actual foreign and New England foreign) is starting to feel like she’s losing her edge. At one point I literally thought, “What am I doing thinking about running a marathon in Texas in February – it might be hot like this… and humid.” I need to get a grip. How pathetic.
The good new though, is that the heat wave is supposed to break tomorrow and then I can go back to running in peace. 50 degrees, firey leaves and loveliness. God needs to reward us with something for the 7 months of cold we’re about to endure. And therein lies the heart of my lostness – that was spoken like a true New Englander, they say, “There’s nothing to say if you can’t complain about the weather.”